Don’t be THAT commuter

By Caitlin Booth

If you don’t notice these things on public transport, then the jerk is probably you.

When it comes to the nine-to-five grind, the commute to and from work can either be hell or it can be an opportunity for some selfish mental health time. Reading a book (old school but still happens…) and listening to music or a podcast are all common commute pastimes and are all relatively enjoyable, depending on the content.

What’s not enjoyable about our daily adventures on public transport? Other commuters.

There’s nothing worse than making it through the doors on a packed carriage to then be battered by the backpack of some oblivious transgressor turning suddenly to figure out if the next stop is there’s. While you’re all for the benefits of a backpack and being ready for anything, a little common courtesy goes a long way and taking off your backpack and holding it by the top strap is the tiniest effort you can make for the comfort of your fellow commuters.

The carriage thins out after a popular stop and you finally nab a seat. Premium, relaxing, podcast time is on the cards, except for the self-righteous a-hole who forgot their headphones but is still persevering with the YouTube rabbit hole they’ve found themselves in.

We all know the pain of having to sit with your own thoughts for an entire commute when you can’t find your headphones before you absolutely have to leave the house. But that doesn’t mean that everyone else in the carriage should have to suffer your screaming goats for the entire commute because of it. Just take one for the team – sit awkwardly and avoid eye contact like everyone else has to.   

Finally you’re off the tube and all you want to do in the last few minutes of your commute is to find out who dunnit on your latest true crime podcast. But, suddenly, you’re overwhelmed with the urge to commit murder yourself because the stationary jerk ahead of you on the escalator hasn’t moved to the left.

You get it, life can be hard and sometimes it’s nice to indulge in a little extra help and let the escalator do all of the work. But don’t let your indulgence get in the way of the efficiency of your fellow commuters because time is ticking and they might have slept in. Don’t be a jerk; stand to the left.

If you find that you’ve never really been put out by any of this behaviour on your own daily travels, maybe take a look around you (take your backpack off first) and have a hot minute of self-reflection. Because it might just be that you’re the nightmare commuter.