Three things you didn’t realize are pissing off your wait staff

By Caitlin Booth

Most of us are good people with the best of intentions; we don’t try to order while on the phone and we tip appropriately. But a lot of us are being huge jerks without even realizing it. Instead of waiting until January to improve yourself as a person by participating in the ‘New Year, New Me’ trends, why not be a better person all year round by paying attention to these simple rules the next time you’re dining out:

1.Say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’.

That’s it. Easy. Employ this rule when you’re ordering, when your order arrives, or if you’re asking for extra ketchup. Manners are the easiest way to earn good person points. Plus it’ll make your mum real proud. If not for the wait staff, do it for your Ma.

2. Drink your water.

For the love of god, if you’re going to pour yourself a glass of table water, you’d better be planning on drinking it. There is a small but special place in hell reserved for the people that pour a full glass of water and then don’t drink it. It’s right next to people who don’t indicate until the last second and the jerks that don’t replace the toilet roll when they finish it.  Full glasses make clearing a table all that much more difficult, so empty those bad boys and make them delightfully stackable.

3. Understand your cutlery.

A knife and a fork lying side by side on a near empty plate screams, “I’m done!” to your waiter. And a coffee cup with a spoon sitting in it is just begging to be cleared. Please don’t be alarmed if your waiter tries to clear your dishes if they look like this, it’s just a universal indication that you’re finished. So your waiter doesn’t feel done with you, keep your tools separate until you’re actually finished eating.